Ever since I was a kid, I've had this desire/need for fairness. I always wanted things to be fair. Fair was if my siblings each got a week of riding in the front seat then I got my one week of front seat riding. Fair was getting to stay up as late as my sixteen and fourteen year old siblings. Fair was getting a car {a junker, but a car nonetheless} when I started driving. Unfair was getting a work detail for chewing gum in junior high math when everyone else in the class was chewing gum too. Unfair was just about any decision-making process at the small-town private school I attended. Unfair was the amount of athleticism my brother inherited and the amount of talent my sister inherited. Unfair was my grandfather dying before seeing my last basketball season of high school.
If you're gonna see me fighting for something, it's probably gonna be for something to be fair. Not just for me but for everybody. I want life to be fair. But it's not.
My favorite Boy Meets World quote is life's tough, get a helmet. I think you could just as well interchange tough for fair. We learn at a pretty young age that there are going to be countless things in life that aren't fair. In my melodramatic teenage years, I seem to vaguely remember screaming as I slammed a door THAT'S NOT FAIR. I hate when things aren't fair.
So fast forward. Present day. I thought things were unfair as a child, but I had no idea what was in store. So many things seem unfair. It's unfair that I have to fast from social media during the holidays to bar my heart from discontentment due to the onslaught of holiday engagements, weddings, pregnancy announcements, and even just the super sappy love posts. It's unfair that our southern culture puts so much emphasis and value on getting married and that something's wrong with you if you're not married. It's unfair that good, God-loving people get cancer. It's unfair that children die. It's unfair that there are 27 million people in slavery today. It's unfair that we live in a world where race is still an issue. Its unfair that ........
The list could go on. & on. & on. & on. There's no stopping.
But you know what else wasn't fair? An innocent man dying on a cross for sins not a one committed by him. Ever. You know what's unfair? This man was beaten for my sin. He bled for my sins. He bore the shame and judgement that should have been mine. Fair would be my sinful self nailed to a tree. Fair would have been me carrying that cross to a hill called Calvary.
But Jesus. Jesus paid it all. All to Him I owe. Sin had left a crimson stain. He washed me white as snow.
Jesus came not to bring fairness to my world in my way. He came to make a way for the people God created and loves (present tense because it never ends). God is just and righteous. He does not turn a blind eye to the injustices of this world. He cares. I can't say I understand this world and the unfairness of it sometimes, but I trust that God is in control and will use what was meant for evil and harm to bring more people to Him and glorify His holy name. So maybe ... just maybe He cares a little less about us thinking life is fair and more about His people focusing on His glory until the day of His second coming. Could God end all sin and all evil right here and now? Absolutely. But God has plans bigger than what we see. He desires a relationship with the people of the world. His creation.
So maybe it's time I lay down my weapons. And maybe it's time for me to stop fighting for fairness in my life and start fighting for God's glory to be known in all that I do. In the end it's not up to me to make things fair. It's up to me to do God's will and to live my life sold out to His purposes. The reality is that there is sin and evil rampantly tearing apart our world, but God calls us to be His light and shine forth for all the world to see.
Life's not fair. But one day God will set all things right.
Fair or unfair, I just gotta keep living for Jesus.